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Extraordinary Story of Devotion…and No LTCi

March 14, 2016 by Honey Leave a Comment

Helping Mother Bathe
Elizabeth helps her mother bathe.
Mark Makela for The New York Times

A story in yesterday’s New York Times titled “Living With the Parents I’m Losing to Alzheimer’s blew me away. I hope non-subscribers can open it.

Here’s the accompanying slideshow.

The story is about Elizabeth Wolf, a very generous, candid, public person with a blog at www.upsidedowndaughter.com.

Read the column or blog to learn that five years ago Ms. Wolf was enjoying young adulthood and exciting new pursuits when she gave them up and returned home to become her parents’ primary caregiver. Both parents have Alzheimer’s Disease. She’s doing this with the help of her extremely devoted husband.

We know from graphic, detailed information in the story about finances and day-to-day coping, neither parent owns long-term care insurance (LTCi).

If you’re like me, you are forced to wonder how extremely different Ms. Wolf’s life and relationships with her husband and parents would be if one or both parents owned LTCi.

Filed Under: Denial, Elephant in the Room, Helpful Information About LTC, I'll Just Self-Insure, Information About LTC, New York Times Tagged With: Elizabeth Wolf, Long Term Care insurance, long-term care, LTC, LTCi, Medicare, Paula Span

Long-Term Care Insurance Can Be Costly but Effective

December 26, 2015 by Honey 1 Comment

Elderly WomanWhy doesn’t this New York Times article report on what its title promises it will, which is the effectiveness of long-term care insurance (LTCi)?

While being factually correct, this article puts the wrong “spin” on things.

It starts by giving the wrong title. LTCi is not necessarily costly. What can easily be far more costly is needing long-term care for anything but a short length of time and not owning LTCi.

The article “hooks” readers in the first paragraph by describing how LTCi preserves wealth. From there, this article gives readers excuses to avoid responsible LTC planning.

The truth is, the most important reason to own LTCi is not to preserve wealth. It is to preserve family integrity by reducing family resentment, stress and discord. The fact that LTCi also preserves wealth, and does it so well, is “icing on the cake.”

Families and governments are in budgetary crisis due to skyrocketing LTC costs.

Reporters and editors need to get the above perspectives corrected. Reporting needs to be done – now – on the hundreds of thousands of families collecting from LTCi and the radical qualitative difference that LTCi creates in their lives.

Here are some examples of the harmful “spin” I’m talking about:

The article hints that Ms. Cheng’s father is collecting enormous amounts from his LTCi policy, but it is not explicit about this. Why not? Why isn’t any space devoted to describing the extraordinary, qualitative difference LTCi has made not only for Ms. Cheng, but for her father?

Does Ms. Cheng own LTCi herself? Her advice about needing correct professional assistance with choosing LTCi, having a holistic outlook about the role of LTCi in estate planning, and asking children for input and help is sage. The reporter (Mr. Wasik)  should have asked her to comment about her own LTCi (if she doesn’t own LTCi, I just don’t understand why not, based on her personal experience and how wise she seems to be).

Instead, Mr. Wasik sidetracks readers with some “red herrings.”

There’s an irrelevant sentence describing how Keith Singer recommends clients with more than $500,000 should own LTCi. (I doubt he has any clients with less than a $500,000 net worth; most financial planners don’t.)  This sentence is harmful to readers, giving lower net-worth people one more excuse to dissuade themselves from doing responsible LTC planning. Such people are far more prone to catastrophe resulting from unplanned LTC needs. Here’s a story about a solid middle class couple with a 0,000 net worth that was devastated by unplanned LTC costs. This couple probably could have purchased very reasonable LTCi while they were insurable.

This sentence does not report on the effectiveness of LTCi (as the title purports) and is again potentially harmful to readers : “After a 90-day “elimination” period (often partly covered by Medicare for people whose need for extra care is hastened by a stroke or other medical emergency), the policy covers all assisted living, community and home care.” This perspective is incorrect, and further goads the American public to avoid responsible LTC planning by hinting that Medicare might assist with LTC costs. Medicare-paid LTC is not only paltry and inadequate; most people are not entitled to it.

Shame on Mr. Wasik and the NYT editors, whom I otherwise hold in high esteem. For the sake of the American public, reporting needs to be done now on the extraordinary, qualitative, transformative difference LTCi has and will make for hundreds of thousands of us.

Filed Under: 3 in 4 Need More, Denial, Helpful Information About LTC, Information About LTC, Misinformation About LTC, New York Times Tagged With: adult day care, assisted living, home care, home health care, Long Term Care insurance, Medicare, New York Times, Nursing Homes, Wealth Preservation

The World’s Greatest Excuses

December 21, 2015 by Honey Leave a Comment

Dog CollarPlease note:  Name below has been changed – I see this person often and consider us good friends.

Women need much more long-term care than men do. This is because we live longer and we have higher odds of getting Alzheimer’s Disease!

Single women have the greatest odds of needing long-term care.

You would think women would take heed. But they’re not!

Here’s the most recent, tragic story of middle class people unprepared for long-term care.

Here’s the most recent story I’ve seen about how long-term care insurance (LTCi) saved the day by conserving wealth and keeping family function in-tact.

Here’s the latest excuse a friend has given to avoid thinking of, and planning for, long-term care (LTC). I’ve changed her name.

Gloria is a single retired university librarian. She has a special needs daughter who will never be independent. She’s in her 60’s. She has another daughter who’s a single professional, living in another state.

Gloria bought a second pedigreed dog. She plans on training this dog to compete in races.

I gather it is very expensive and takes the equivalent – and more – than long-term care insurance (LTCi) premium would cost to buy, maintain, and train this type of dog.

She told me the new dog will keep her active and will help her avoid needing long-term care.

Filed Under: Denial, Helpful Information About LTC, I'll Just Self-Insure, Information About LTC Tagged With: Alzheimers Disease, Excuses For Not Buying LTCi, Long Term Care insurance, long-term care, LTCi, Medicaid, Medicare

Where’s the Disconnect?

October 23, 2015 by Honey Leveen Leave a Comment

DisconnectMuch of the legacy we leave may be measured by how honestly we’ve dealt with life’s most painful truths. Often, such truths are the most obvious, yet hardest to see clearly. 

I’ve seen a few hundred of my nearly 3,000 clients collect from policies I’ve sold them during the past 25+ years. This is just the tip of the iceberg, however; many more will need to collect from their LTCi as time goes on.

For different reasons, when a parent needs LTC, family members who’ve always gotten along well may find themselves at odds with each other. The absence of sufficient, readily available money to swiftly access long-term care (LTC) aggravates an already highly stressful situation.

What makes things so different for them for those who own LTCi is that their LTCi policies pay out significant, meaningful amounts of money when LTC is needed. This is often a huge game changer. LTCi tends to subdue emotional discord. Relationships don’t suffer as much, and outcomes are better. The money people collect from LTCi provides them with dignity, choices, access, and options they would not have otherwise had.

Sadly, most of us still do not own LTCi. Sadder still, it is too often well-educated people with good incomes and a whole lot to lose who choose to be unprepared for LTC.

Such people come up with what they think are fabulous excuses avoid discussing what might happen to them at the end of their lives. There seems to be a disconnect between our intellect and our emotions when it comes to LTC planning.

According to www.longtermcare.gov and other reputable sources, at age 65, there’s a 70% chance of needing LTC. These odds go up with each year we age. Visit Genworth’s Cost of Care Calculator to see just how expensive LTC is in your locale.

Most LTC in the US is provided on an unpaid basis, disproportionately by women, who often have to sacrifice their careers, savings, and relationships to provide care. LTC already costs American families dearly, yet the worst of this crisis is yet to come.

As former First Lady Rosalynn Carter said, “There are only four kinds of people in this world: those who have been caregivers, those who are caregivers, those who will be caregivers, and those who will need caregivers.”

Major Misconceptions About LTC and LTCi

Here are some simple responses to major misconceptions about LTC and LTCi. More complex answers are found on the Resources or LTCi FAQ pages of this site,  or by calling me, at no obligation:

  1. LTCi is too expensive. Not true. What may be expensive is needing LTC for anything but a short time and not owning LTCi. Policyholders usually collect back all premiums they’ve paid over the life of their policy in a few short months. Premiums are customized for each person and can be made to fit into almost anyone’s budget.
  2. The government pays for LTC. The type of LTC the government pays for is not what you would freely choose.
  3. Medicare covers LTC. No it doesn’t! Medicare covers acute medical problems and a restrictive, conditional amount of home or in-patient rehabilitative care that most people don’t qualify for.*
  4. The LTCi industry is threatened. It’s true that the number of carriers selling LTCi has shrunk; there are valid reasons. Policyholders are not in danger. LTCi carriers remain staunchly committed to the market. They realize the LTC crisis and oncoming Senior Tsunami isn’t going away any time soon, and are in it for the long run.
  5. LTCi only pays for nursing homes. The opposite is true. The great majority of LTCi policies pay comprehensively, for care at home, in adult day care, assisted living, and nursing homes. They enable you to increase the odds you will not need LTC provided in a nursing home.

Here are some of many silly excuses smart people give me to avoid conversing about LTCi while they’re healthy and can find reasonable premiums:

My wife will take care of me. Really? Your wife will be eager and physically capable of helping you bathe and dress, for example? You don’t mind the thought of her last memories being about the physical, emotional and financial burdens of caring for you?

That won’t happen to me. Really?

My kids will take care of me. Really?

I’ll kill myself.

I can’t afford LTCi. Many people claim LTCi is too expensive, despite the fact that we tailor LTCi premiums to fit into most people’s budgets. Situations like this one happen frequently: an acquaintance tells me she can’t afford LTCi premiums. This person’s mother needed LTC for an extended length of time, at great sacrifice to the family. A week later this person announces she is making a two week trip to Mt. Everest Base Camp/African photo safari/Tahiti or another exotic locale, or is buying a top-of-the-line car/kayak/audio equipment, etc. She has the money to do that but can’t afford LTC premiums. Where’s the disconnect?

Here’s another common scenario: I get incoming calls with Caller ID stating: “METHODIST HOSP RE-HAB”. The caller is the daughter or son of someone who’s just broken their hip or suffered a stroke. They ask me to come sell their parent LTCi. I have the unpleasant task of trying to tactfully explain that their parent is uninsurable. Sometimes the child is incensed by this news. I suggest the child is of ideal age to find reasonably priced LTCi for themselves; this might be a wise idea if they want to assure a similar scenario doesn’t play out when at the end of their lives. The child is normally not interested. The reason is that the family is in the worst kind of turmoil, duress, and dysfunction. They are scurrying around trying to cobble together LTC for their parent, and there isn’t sufficient, readily accessible money to pay for it. This is the scenario Dayna and I urge you to avoid by doing reasonable, responsible LTC planning, now.

What all of my LTCi clients have in common, regardless of their incomes, is the ability to honestly, openly discuss LTC in advance. Most of my clients have had firsthand experiences caring for someone who needed LTC. They’ve learned from them, and taken action to avoid the consequences of not being prepared for their own long-term care.

Filed Under: Denial, Elephant in the Room, Helpful Information About LTC, I'll Just Self-Insure, Information About LTC Tagged With: caregivers, Honey Leveen, Long Term Care insurance, ltc planning, LTCi, Medicaid, Medicare, Rosalynn Carter, Significant Benefits, www.honeyleveen.com

One Mother Can Take Care of 6 Children, But 6 Children Can’t Take Care of One Mother

October 7, 2015 by Honey Leveen Leave a Comment

Tobe GerardThank you to my dear friend and colleague Tobe Gerard, of www.TobeGerardInsurance.com for allowing me to re-publish the following poignant and true story:

“I met with Valerie and Eric last week.  Valerie is 58 and Eric is 60.   They self-reported to be in good health.   They have been married for 35 years and have two grown children. Eric works full time as a software engineer.  Valerie is looking for a job.  Based upon their recent personal experience with Valerie’s mother, their financial advisor recommended that they meet with me to learn more about long term care insurance.

Their story starts five years ago when Valerie left her full time management job to care for her mother in their home.  Valerie has two sisters who live in the next town who said that they would definitely be willing to help out, but whenever Valerie asked for their help they were never available.  Her three brothers are scattered throughout the U.S. and “helicoptered” in no more than five times each during the five years of their mother’s decline.  Valerie’s mother passed away in August and Valery still looks exhausted.  Her latent frustration was pretty poignant:  “My dad died when he was in his 30’s. My mother had to raise all 6 of us kids by herself and she did it without a complaint.  How is it that 1 mother can raise 6 children, but 6 children can’t take care of 1 mother!”

Family caregiving has very little romance attached to it.  It’s a 24/7 job that allows the caregiver to work longer and harder than at any paid position he/she will ever have.  2/3 of all unpaid caregivers are women.  Most are middle aged.  Many are at the height of their careers.  Most are not prepared for the complicated and difficult role that they’ve signed on for as they bear witness to a loved one’s functional status decline inch by inch.  Valerie admitted to being continually sleep deprived, anxious, short tempered, and she became a “½ empty’ rather than a “½ full” person as depression set in.  She noticed that she had less and less time for her own family, friends, and neighbors, but she still believed that family caregiving was the right solution.  As the years went by, Eric found himself no longer feeling the same way. He felt helpless as he watched the demands that his mother in law’s care was placing upon his wife’s well-being.  He didn’t want his mother in law to pass, but he didn’t want to lose his wife either.  He wondered when their life had become so unmanageable.

We were able to have a solid conversation about how they thought a long term care event would affect each of them based upon what they had just lived through.  Eric admitted that they didn’t have a plan in place should either of them need long term care: “They offered us long term care insurance at work a few years ago, but I never gave it a serious thought.  We were in good health so we thought we could put it off and talk about it down the road.”  For people who are 58 and 60, there is no “down the road.”  I explained to them that there is a cost to waiting, and that cost is that if something changes with their good health then they may not be able to purchase LTCi in the future.  Exploring long term care insurance now would allow them to put a plan in place so that they could eliminate a crisis in the future, allowing their children to avoid what they had lived through with Valerie’s mother.

As advisors we don’t talk enough about the non financial benefits of having a LTCi policy; it allows families to maintain and restore the healthy functional roles and relationships that we want and need to have in place when a loved one requires care. The benefits of having a LTCi policy in place reaches families every day and continues to have an incredibly positive impact.   

Any LTCi is better than none. Even a modest LTCi policy can be a lifesaver.  I have a 91 year old client with a diagnosis of Dementia who is claiming benefits under his policy at the present time.  His policy pays $100/day which provides him with 4 hours of home care, 7 days/week.   Those 4 hours of home care allow his 88 year old wife to no longer have to bathe him, shave him, brush his teeth, dress him, prepare his breakfast, or do their laundry.  Those 4 hours of home care are a godsend!”

Filed Under: Denial, Elephant in the Room, I'll Just Self-Insure, Information About LTC Tagged With: Honey Leveen, Long Term Care insurance, LTCi, Tobe Gerard, www.honeyleveen.com, www.tobegerardinsurance.com

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Honey Leveen, LUTCF, CLTC, LTCP
“The Queen, by Self-Proclamation, of Long-Term Care Insurance (LTCi)”
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Phone: 713-988-4671
Fax: 281-829-7177

Email: honey@honeyleveen.com

Email: honey@honeyleveen.com

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